Motherhood was never something I gave much thought to. As an 18-year-old still putting my life together, that was the last thing I wanted.
Health care barriers and social distancing make this experience even harder to navigate — but you have more supporters than you even know
I’ve always been in tune with my body. When my period was four days late, I knew something was wrong, but I waited. On the seventh day, I took a pregnancy test, and it was no surprise that I was pregnant.
I knew what I needed to do — I couldn’t go through with an unwanted pregnancy — I just didn’t know how to get an abortion. Everything was so stressful; it was the only thing I could think about.
This pandemic didn’t make my situation any better. I was already into about a month of lockdown when I found out I was pregnant. I was scared that my rights would be taken away, and I would be forced to go through with an unwanted pregnancy.
Like many Americans, I didn’t have health insurance, but I’d heard that abortions cost up to $500 and even more for the surgical procedure. I had no idea how I’d be able to afford that within a few weeks.
A pandemic cannot get in the way of your human rights.
I couldn’t tell anyone close to me out of fear of being judged. The feeling of being alone was overwhelming at times. Social distancing because of the coronavirus just added another layer on top of my loneliness. I couldn’t see my friends, and I was also unable to open up to them.
I started researching my options, which led me to meet a Planned Parenthood patient advocate. She told me to get in contact with my local abortion fund, which could help with paying for the procedure. It was tough to find an estimate for how much it would cost for a medical abortion in my state, but eventually, I found out the total came to $385, and I would need to pay half. I started rounding up things around my house that I didn’t necessarily need, like gifts that I never used, to sell on Letgo and Facebook Marketplace. I also received help from fellow supporters.
The process to finally obtain an abortion was not fast. I often found myself crying over the unknown. My body literally became a ticking time bomb. In total, it took me about three weeks after finding out I was pregnant before I received treatment. I was seven weeks and two days into the pregnancy.
Due to the coronavirus outbreak, all my interactions with the doctors were through telehealth video calls, but I did need to go to Planned Parenthood to pick up the abortion pills. I also picked up my prescriptions at the pharmacy for pain and nausea.
On the first day, I took the mifepristone, and the next day, I took the misoprostol. Nothing could have prepared me for the pain I would experience for the next seven hours. I felt uncontrollable shaking and cramps that made me yell all night long. I used the bathroom probably 100 times in an attempt to speed the process up if I could. Every second that went by, I was holding back my nausea. Then it passed.
Everything seemed to get better from that point. The relief I felt once it was over was amazing. I felt in control of my life, and I had no regrets. I’m a believer that everything happens for a reason, and while it’s unfortunate for anyone to have to go through an abortion, it taught me sides of people that I’d not noticed before — both good and bad. This was my experience, but every woman who goes through this will have her own to tell.
A pandemic cannot get in the way of your human rights. You have more supporters than you even know. If you are going through this, you aren’t alone. Depending on where you live, obtaining treatment can be very easy or very hard but not impossible. Many people are ordering pills online if that is their only option.
Abortion does not have to be a topic of taboo. Women do not need to hide in the dark with their struggles. This is a real issue that women face daily, and there should be more discussion. This is just my experience, but I hope by sharing it, more women will open up and make abortion a normal and accepted issue to talk about.